His Woman, His Wife, His Widow Page 5

  Shaun had certainly said more than a mouthful. Under the circumstances, I understood him putting Rhonda out. But I was still a little confused. “Did you and Rhonda get back together after you made her leave?” Earlier he told me they only broke up a few weeks ago.

  “Yeah, but it was never the same. I felt bad for the way I talked to her, so after her constant begging and promising that things would be different, I gave in and let her come back after about a week. I also hoped Rhonda would have missed the baby and once she came back she would become a better mother. She came back and began working on our relationship wholeheartedly. She stopped gossiping with her girlfriends, she began studying for her GED, and she became more helpful with the housework, but Sha’Ron still was not a priority. Eventually I ended it for good, telling her that she didn’t have to worry about caring for either of us. We would be fine without her.”

  “And that was just a couple of weeks ago,” I stated more than asked. “Did you guys ever work out any type of custody and visitation arrangement?”

  I wanted to know exactly where Rhonda now stood in his life and how often he saw the wench. Even though I had only known Shaun a day, I started feeling extremely possessive of him and more than a little jealous of his ex-girlfriend. I needed to know if Shaun still carried any feelings for Rhonda in his heart. I didn’t state any of those questions out loud. I just hoped it would come across in his answers.

  “I never made good on my threat to go to court to get full custody of my son. He has just remained with me since I put Rhonda out. She comes by three or four times a week claiming she is there to see Sha’Ron, but she spends very little time with him. She somehow manages to end up in my face saying we need to get back together and be a family again.”

  Shaun was frowning. I hoped that meant the idea of getting back together with her made him sick. But I had to give it to home girl. I can understand why it would be difficult giving up on a man like Shaun.

  “Listen, Lindsay. I am not trying to get you involved in something you can’t handle or lead you into a relationship filled with lies. I’m being very straightforward with you because I like you,” Shaun said very softly and convincingly.

  “The truth of the matter is Rhonda will always be a part of my life because she is the mother of my son. But that is all I want her to be. I know how she feels about me and I can’t help that, but trust me when I say the feelings are not reciprocated. I respect her, and I try not to be mean when she comes around. But I’m always firm with her when I tell her we are not getting back together.” Shaun must have had a connection to my mind. He seemed to always know what I was thinking and had answered just the way I wanted him to.

  When I looked at the clock on the dash of Shaun’s car, it read four-twelve. I couldn’t believe we had been talking for an hour. My mother was likely to be home any minute. She normally doesn’t get off work until four-thirty, but she had been known to pull an early showing when I was grounded to make sure I wasn’t breaking the conditions of my punishment. That would be all I needed right now. I couldn’t stand it if she grounded me for any longer. I was so anxious to go out with Shaun.

  “Thanks, Shaun, for telling me about your breakup with Rhonda. I know it is a lot of personal information to share with someone you hardly know. I appreciate your honesty.” I opened the door to exit the car. “I really need to get in the house before my mama calls or even worse, comes home early.”

  “I understand, beautiful. Thank you for the ear and for not openly judging me. I’m sure you will have a mouthful to share with your girl, Shyanne.” He smiled. “Can I swing by after school tomorrow and pick you ladies up?”

  I forgot he mentioned that earlier. “I would love it. I look forward to spending time with you at every available opportunity.” I could not believe I said that even though it was exactly how I felt. I guess this honesty thing he was always talking about was rubbing off on me too. Perhaps I should credit Bible Study and my mother too.

  “Now that’s the way I like to hear my future woman talking. By the way, Lindsay, what’s your last name?”

  I barely heard his question because I was still stuck on the future woman remark. Now that’s the way I like to hear him talking. I’m already crazy about this guy.

  “Lindsay, did you hear me? I asked you your last name.”

  “Oh! I’m sorry. I was daydreaming a little. My last name is Westbrook. What’s yours?”

  “Taylor. My full name is Shaun Robert Taylor.”

  Lindsay Taylor. That has a pretty cool ring to it. “Well, Mr. Taylor, I have to get in the house before I get into some serious trouble. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Until tomorrow beautiful.” Then he was gone.

  Chapter Four

  “Heavenly Father, I come to you this morning thanking you for waking me this morning. I thank you, God, for a peaceful night’s rest. I thank you for my family and my best friend’s family. I thank you that we are healthy and clothed in our right minds. And Father, I ask in special prayer that my date with Shaun today goes well and that we start a relationship that is filled with love and trust and respect. This I pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.”

  Today Shaun and I were to go on our first official date. Even though I had managed to see him every day since we met, I am as nervous as if this were a complete blind date. I can’t get my thoughts together. I can’t remember what he looks like, what he smells like, or a single thing we have talked about over the last four days. No guy has ever given me the flux like this.

  Shaun called me bright and early this morning, telling me how excited he was that we would finally be able to spend some time together without sneaking around. He informed me that he would pick me up around four-thirty and we would have the dinner he promised me when we first met. We would play the rest of the evening by ear.

  I had been looking for something suitable to wear since I got off the phone with Shaun. Here it was three hours later, and I have not decided on a thing. This is ridiculous.

  “Nay-Nay, girl, you are going to have to pull yourself together and get back to your usual totally-in-control-of-the-situation self. You can’t let this guy know he has you sweating like this. I’m sure Shaun is not sitting at home with a headache, running around like a chicken with his head cut off for this date,” I spoke aloud to myself. I figured it was time to hit my knees again and get God’s help on getting me to this date, not just through it.

  “God, I come back again in just a short time needing your peace and your assurance. Lord, I need you to calm me and to give me confidence so that I can prepare myself for my date. Again I pray in Jesus, name. Amen.” Just after I prayed a thought came to mind.

  Never let a man know he has the upper hand in your relationship. At least not in the beginning. Never be the first one to say I love you, and until he makes a formal attempt at a commitment, always act like he is just one of the many guys you deal with. That was advice Granny started giving me when I was ten years old. She had repeated it many times over the years.

  “Thank you for bringing that to my memory, God. Okay, Granny! I won’t let you down. I will pull myself together and act like I date guys as fine and as grown up as Shaun all the time.”

  I checked the weather report on the news and the funny looking guy on channel four said it would be warm for March; temperatures reaching into the high sixties. So I will wear my peach denim pants with the matching jacket. I will add to it my yellow tank top and my yellow Nikes.

  “See, girl, look at you. You made a decision without sweating and second-guessing yourself. If you can just hang on to this attitude until after church, you will be just fine when he picks you up this afternoon.”

  Well I’ll be a funky duck!—One of Granny’s sayings.—My calm attitude went right out the freaking window. I just realized I had not asked Mama if it was cool for me to even go on this date. How could I forget such an important piece of the puzzle? All I needed was for her to trip and say I couldn’t go. And even if she did let me go
, she was going to give me the third degree about Shaun. She was going to have a fit about his age and the kind of car he drives.

  Okay! Okay! Okay! God shall supply all my needs. And what I need right now is a miracle. Okay! There is nothing I can do about that right now. Mama will be ready to leave for church in five minutes. Hopefully while we are in service, God will give me the advice I need to get Mama’s permission to go on this date.

  Service today was pretty much the same as always. No lightning bolts. No rain of fire. No advice to help with my predicament. Prayerfully God spoke to Mama’s heart and she was prepared to be receptive.

  Well, I might as well go on and get it over with. That way if she does say no, Shaun will have plenty of time to make others plans for his day. No sense having him wait until the last minute for me to tell him I can’t go.

  I entered the kitchen and found my brother there eating what was probably his fifth bowl of cereal for the day. “K.J., where’s Mama?”

  K.J. is the spitting image of our dad. I only remember what my father looks like from the pictures Mama has of him in our photo albums. They have the same tall, slim build, the same tan brown coloring, and the same sandy brown hair.

  The only thing he got from our mother is his eyes. We all have the hazel brown eyes.

  Whenever Mama gets mad at K.J. she yells at him to get out of her face. She says he looks so much like our dad she can’t stand the sight of him. For that reason, the boy has hardly ever gotten a spanking. I think she’s afraid once she starts to hit him she will take out all of her frustrations at Daddy on Kevin Jr. Too bad I don’t look like our father because she has never had a problem whacking me around when she felt I needed it. I look like Mama.

  “She’s in the basement washing clothes,” Kevin said through a mouthful of Fruit Loops. After chewing and swallowing he added, “Who were you on the phone with before church this morning? It wouldn’t happen to be a certain guy who drives a red Trans Am would it?” he asked with this stupid grin on his face.

  “Boy, what are you talking about? What do you know ’bout a guy in a red Trans Am?” I tried to pretend I was clueless.

  “Nay, you can give up the innocent act. I saw y’all sitting in front of the house on Thursday and Friday. You were so busy smiling up in his face, you didn’t even notice me when I got home from school. I could have been Mama and you wouldn’t have noticed over that big ole grin on your face.”

  K.J. was cracking up laughing at me.

  He was right. I must have been seriously slipping not to notice Kevin on either day. More proof that I needed to stop letting Shaun have this much control over me. “Shut up, boy, before your mother hears you. You didn’t happen to say anything to her did you?”

  “If I had told Mama, don’t you think she would have said something to you? I could use a little hush-hush money though. Being thirteen can be expensive,” Kevin whispered and laughed again.

  I’m pretty sure my little brother would not tell on me. He never had before. We watched out for each other like that. But I told him I would hook him up when I got my allowance because he didn’t tell. I then went to the basement, which also doubled as our family room, to find Mama. She sat on the sofa folding towels and watching television.

  “What’s up, Mama! You need some help?” I asked as I flopped down next to her. I picked up a towel and started folding.

  “What’s up with you, Nay-Nay? And don’t even come down here with that can I help you mess,” Mama said as she snatched the towel out of my hand. “What do you want, child? And before you answer that question, try answering this one. Who was calling my house at the crack of dawn this morning? Your behind just got off punishment today, so whoever it was must have been waiting by the phone to call you since the day I grounded you. I know it was not Shyanne because that child doesn’t even get out of bed until ten minutes before she absolutely has to.”

  Dang, did everybody on the block hear the phone ring when Shaun called this morning? “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about, Mommy.” My mother rolled her eyes at me because I only call her Mommy when I want something big.

  “Talk, Nay-Nay, and quit all this butt-kissing. Something tells me this is going to be good.”

  Okay, the best way to handle her straightforward attitude was to just go for it. “Can I go on a date today?”

  Mama stopped in mid fold and looked at me like I was crazy. That was a bad sign. “A date with who, Ms. Thang? Is that who called my house this morning, some boy wanting to take you out?”

  The more Mama talked, the quicker I could see my date with Shaun becoming less and less of a reality. “His name is Shaun, Mama. I met him the last time you sent me to the grocery store. I told him I was grounded until today, so I guess he was kind of anxious to talk since we haven’t talked since we met.” I hated lying to my mother, and it was something I rarely did. But what was I supposed to say, we had been kicking it everyday while she was at work? NOT!

  “Well, since you have only met Mr. Shaun once, why are you trying to go on a date with him so fast? What do you know about the rock-head boy besides absolutely nothing? He couldn’t have told you that much over the phone this morning. What has gotten into you, Nay-Nay?”

  I might as well call Shaun and tell him it was nice knowing him because I didn’t know how long he would be willing to wait for my mama to say I have known him long enough to go out with him. But she still hadn’t said no, so there was still some hope.

  “Ma, listen. I know I haven’t known Shaun long, but he seems like a very mature guy. When we met, he didn’t act like the guys my age act when they meet someone they might like.” Oh snap! I can’t believe I let that slip.

  It took Mama a minute to realize what I said, but as soon as she realized it, she zeroed right in on it. “Well, just how old is Mr. Rock-head?”

  Why does she keep calling him Rock-head? She has formed a negative opinion about him without having met him yet. And if that were the case, when I told her his age, it would only go down hill from there. I wondered if I should lie to her again. Naw, if I did she would have a royal fit when and if she ever learned the truth.

  “Shaun is nineteen, Mama,” I said as matter-of-factly as I could, trying to make it sound like it was no big deal.

  “Lindsay Renee Westbrook, did you say this boy was nineteen? Don’t you think that’s a little too old for you?” At that moment I was almost sure my date was as good as a dead issue, but I was still not ready to give up.

  “Not really, Mama. It’s only three years. Would it be so bad if he were twenty and I was seventeen?”

  “Yes it would,” Mama said rather sharply.

  “Okay, what if we were twenty-one and eighteen?” I knew I was pushing it, but I couldn’t help it. Until she said no, I felt I still had a fighting chance.

  “At eighteen, honey, you are a grown woman, dating a grown man. Right now you are a sixteen-year-old child trying to date a grown man.”

  “Aw, Mama, come on. I’m not a baby, and I think I’m a pretty good judge of character. Shaun is really cool. He’s not some child molester or something.” I pleaded my case, throwing in a little extra whining.

  “Again, I ask you, how would you know how cool he is? You have only had two brief conversations with the rock-head boy.”

  Man! She was making me mad. She was sitting there talking about how I didn’t really know anything about him. She didn’t know him at all, yet she had given the man an ugly nickname.

  “Listen, Nay. Most nineteen-year-old boys are not interested in sixteen-year-old girls. They don’t usually date girls still in high school. They prefer college-aged females like themselves. Is Shaun attending college somewhere? Does he attend church?”

  Okay. She caught me off guard with those questions. I never even thought to ask him, and he surely didn’t volunteer the information. But aside from that, what did she know about who dated whom? The only person she ever dated at my age was her sorry husband, and we see how that turned out. Now would p
robably not be the best time to bring that to her attention, however. I was still trying to win this argument and be given permission to go on this date. I needed to use a tone of voice that said I understood my mother’s concerns, but there was still room to compromise. I had to use what Shaun found so attractive about me; my maturity and intellect.

  “Like you said, Mommy, I have only had a couple conversations with Shaun, so I don’t know whether or not he attends college. We also didn’t discuss whether or not he went to church, but he knows I attend because I told him I was getting ready to go when he called me this morning.

  “Shaun thinks I’m mature, Mama. He was impressed with my vocabulary, the one you said I have because of my love of reading.” Giving Mama her props was definitely a plus at a time like this. “Before you pass judgment, why don’t you meet him first and see what you think? After that, if you say I should not go out with him, I won’t bother you with it again.”

  Mama looked to the sky, then took a long deep breath, letting it out in a sigh. That meant she was seriously thinking about giving in to me. If she were going to say no, she usually just says it.

  “What time is he supposed to pick you up?”

  Yes! She was caving. “Around four-thirty.” I could hardly contain my smile, but I didn’t want to seem over confident so I held it.

  “When he gets here, I want him to come in and have a seat in my living room. I would like to have a conversation with him. And I’m telling you, Nay, if there is anything about him at all that strikes me as not right, I’ll tell him to his face that he is never to contact you again. Do you understand me?”

  “Yes, Mama.”

  I needed Shaun to put on the charm because I wasn’t trying to have my mama embarrass either one of us.

  Four-fifty-five and Shaun hasn’t gotten here nor has he called. I hope everything is fine. On the two days Shaun picked me up from school, he was right on time, and I don’t even remember giving him my schedule, so I’m not used to him being late. His tardiness was not winning any brownie points with Mama either.